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The trip to L.A. to attend Christian Carter's first-ever dating seminar in January 2006 was a success...
...on the friendship front.
I left L.A. feeling warm and connected, clutching a handful of email addresses of ladies I'd write to on and off for the next year. I wasn't sure I knew much more about attracting a man, but what I was certain of is that it is our connections with other women that help us get through those painful bumps in the road to love.
Other women help us feel that we're not alone, that we're not a freak for having been dumped or rejected. Other women soothe our wounded spirits by offering us affection, reassurance, and companionship. Other women help us see that what happened to us is just an experience, and that someday we'll be able to offer our story to console a weeping friend, just as our friends are offering the stories of their past experiences right now to us.
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There's a story I tell over and over again.
When I first started in the dating industry, I was preparing to go to L.A. to a dating seminar.
Before I left, my boss held a meeting to discuss what I'd accomplish while I was there. One of the issues he brought up was my appearance.
I was preparing to meet one of the "big guns" in the industry, a guy who made more money than all of us small fry combined, and it was imperative that I impress him in order to have any chance at partnering up in joint ventures.
My boss asked me how I was going to present myself. I said that I hadn't thought about it.
He explained, earnestly and innocently, that I should, because the guys I was about to meet were going to look at me and ask themselves, “Am I attracted to her?”
If the answer was no, then I was not going to have any credibility.
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What makes someone a credible relationships expert?
It's a question I never thought about before becoming one myself.
When I began writing dating and relationship advice, I worried that I'd be called out for my lack of expertise. After all, all I'd done was go on a lot of dates and read a lot of books. There were real dating experts out there who had, like, degrees and stuff.
But then I began meeting the other "experts" who, like myself, were writing dating advice online, and I began to realize that anyone can be a dating expert if they're willing to call themselves one.
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As I mentioned in my post on "Looks and the Dating Expert," what you look like really does matter in a field like dating and relationships. Sure, you might take marriage advice from a gray-haired, venerable counselor - but would you take dating advice from someone who isn't attractive?
So when, in January 2006, my boss scheduled for me to fly to L.A. to attend a conference by Christian Carter of "Catch Him and Keep Him" fame, I had a makeover to plan. This would be my first opportunity to meet many of the major players in the women's dating and relationship e-book market, and I knew from my research that first impressions count.
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When I first began writing relationship advice, I wanted to know how best to reach my audience.
So I went directly to the source and asked a range of women how they preferred to learn about dating and relationship skills.
There are so many products on the market that profess to teach women to attract more men and have better relationships than the ones they’re in. Women can go to seminars, buy books, listen to CDs, and purchase packages discretely online.
So what makes one product better than another?
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